That Moment When the Wheel of Fortune Turns Against A Really Rotten Human

Image by Vicki Lynn from Pixabay

Hello _____,

One of the last bits of wisdom my grandfather passed on to my cousin before he died was: “Remember this. You are nothing without your integrity.”

I’ve already filed a police report about some missing pieces of jewelry that belonged to my deceased father. To jog your memory - a gold watch, a watch with a large round gold face and leather wristband, a gold coin medallion with a thick chain, and a ring with an oval-shaped emerald.

In the next few days, I’ll follow up by sending the report or filing fresh reports with various Hawaiian police departments - just in case those pieces show up in pawn shops there.

The last time I saw these items was in mid-May of last year, when I was writing the memorial essays about Dad. By November 2nd, I noticed them missing because I wanted one of the watches for his Day of the Dead altar. When I went to the armoire where I kept the jewelry wallet (wrapped in a canvas bag) that held those pieces, it was gone.

I’ve been spring cleaning and emptied out the guest bedroom. Those items have not turned up.

Due to the pandemic, there were no guests in that room. Very few people came over, and those who did never went in that room. The only people who went into the guest bedroom on a regular basis were A and her sister or son, and you.

I double-checked with the friends who had recommended A to me. My friends swear by the honesty of that family. She has cleaned for them for close to 20 years. They have recommended the A crew to 7 other friends/couples, and everybody raves about how excellent, conscientious and trustworthy they are.

People work hard to establish their professional reputations. I never believed they stole from me. A few of my friends did mainly because they couldn't accept that somebody who lived with me and knew me would do something like that. It's awful that A and her team were put in a suspicious light through no fault of their own.

I know you like to blame a ghost that follows you because things go missing wherever you are. But it really looks to me like you’re a thief and a liar.

I can’t prove that you took the jewelry – along with so many other things that went missing while you lived here - but I’m 90% sure you did.

My therapist is exceptionally perceptive. Her discernment is so on-point, I wonder if she’s psychic. In the 5 ½ years I’ve seen her, she has never been wrong. She’s called it every time.

When I described to her what happened and that I was looking through the pawn shops in Portland, her immediate response was:

“Oh, she still has it. She’s going to want to keep the jewelry because it’s expensive, especially the ring with an emerald. Kleptomania is odd. In her mind she knows the emotional distress that missing jewelry will cause you, and that’s what gives her satisfaction. Knowing that she got back at you for having something she doesn’t.”

Wow. That's really demented.

With all the meals together, the chats, the confidences, the shared holidays, the little gifts to the neighbors, the platitudes of manifesting your desires from the Universe, and putting the positivity of light and love out there - underneath all that is the seething venom of malice, spite, envy, greed, and hate.

I have a few questions for you:

1.    How can you stand to fake nice your way through life?

2.    What the hell do you think you’re going to manifest with that hidden ugly-nasty that you’re so good at concealing? I hope you like smelly farts and diarrhea showers because that's likely what you have coming from the Universe.

3.    Do you actually aspire to be Gollum from Lord of the Rings, obsessing over “your precious,” and fuming over anybody who has it better than you? That character was so repugnant I cringed every time he was on the screen.

My life is blessed, and nothing you can do will ever take that away from me.

Fuck you anyway. I deserve the blessings life has to offer - love, friendship, abundance. And if this is the way you treat people, you really don’t.

You don't have a single justifiable reason for any of this.

I gave you an excellent deal that was far below market value for Portland to start. Not to mention that you got $300/month off your rent - for no more than 12 hours work/month, cleaning biweekly and doing the cat boxes during a pandemic.

In case you forgot, you approached me about that arrangement. I was hardly exploiting you. During a horrible time where most people were terrified of losing everything, you had it pretty good. I didn't even know you before you answered my ad for a housemate.

And you want to get back at me? Really?

Sure, it sucks that irreplaceable mementos of my father were probably stolen by a fake-nice human like you. I even felt like I had been raped for a while. Thievery is not the same as a violent sexual assault. But given that I trusted you with my home, where I should have been completely safe in a state of deep grief and depression, physical rape is the only way I could have felt more violated.

It's beyond belief to me that you would find any gratification in that.

Do you find the thought satisfying that I might hate you?

I pity you, Kylee.

I don't need the jewelry. They're material items and I can let them go. Dad's legacy lives on in me, and that can never be stolen.

I think you've been ripping off people you know for a long time. That's a lot of baggage you're carrying, along with the horrible karma of stealing pieces of a dead man's heritage.

Character is destiny. You really are nothing without your integrity. There is no getting away with anything - even when you think you did. Because what you do ultimately becomes what you are.

There must be a thrill, a rush of adrenaline every time you steal and don't get caught - every time you find satisfaction in feeding your greed, envy, malice, spite, and hate.

But you pay a price for that.

What is starved are those inner qualities that bring love, friendship, community, family, success, and true abundance - and I believe you crave all that, as well as the "love and light" you claim to stand for.

But it is impossible to bond with somebody who presents a face to the world that doesn't match what's going on inside because there's nothing genuine to connect to. Nothing "woke" about that.

I can't imagine the emotional desolation it must take to do people like that.

Yet if you insist on avarice, on greedily grasping heirlooms you have no right to - whether they are in your parents' house, in boxes at your friend’s house, with you in ___, or wherever else they end up - what are you bringing on yourself but bad luck?

There is another option, Kylee. If that jewelry is returned safely to me - and I don't care how that happens - I won’t press charges.

It would be even better if most, if not all, of the missing or “broken” items that disappeared from my house while you lived here also showed up.

I can’t promise that will clear your karma. But it’s a step in the right direction.

Here’s my address and phone number in case you forgot or in case somebody you know needs to get a hold of me:

_____

For your sake, I hope you take that sharp detour to the high road, even if the incline is steep.
M