Thus Buddha was freed up to reach enlightenment, instead of having to defend his meditative state from an onslaught of shit.
One of the things that really strikes me every time I see a painting or statue of her is her striking sensuality and beauty. Often, she’s topless and when she’s not, she’s wearing a bandeau around her breasts. Her sexual nature is obvious.
The Buddhists aren’t known for their celebration of sexuality, so I find that interesting.
Also, there’s something about this legend that reminds me of the union of Shakti and Shiva, even if the Thorani wasn’t Buddha’s girlfriend. Well, he had already left his wife and son to become the Buddha, so…
But Shakti is the dynamic energy who wakes Shiva up, who is in a deep meditative state. And in this instance, the Thorani protects the Buddha, so he can remain in his meditative state to reach nirvana.
The stories are different, but something about the nature of them is similar. This isn’t the first time I noticed that vague connection between Hinduism and Buddhism.
A former novice/monk who took me on a tour of one of the temples said: “Oh we’re also Hindu,” when I mentioned it.
Perhaps this is my imagination, yet I kind of feel like Thorani has been my guardian earth goddess on this trip. Maybe because I’ve been meeting an extraordinary number of my sisters since I got to SE Asia.
The strangest and some kind of wonderful thing happened to me last night. Kip and Angela left on Friday (right now is Thursday morning in Laos). Except for dinner with Peter on Saturday, I’ve had little connection with people since my friends left.
(Peter was a new friend picked up on our first night here in Luang Prabang when Angela offered him a banana as he was walking past. It stopped him in his tracks, and he kept saying in a German accent that there had to be a catch. No catch. Angela thought he was cute, and that’s how Kip and Angela roll. Everybody is invited to the party.)
I was thinking about traveling alone and ways to draw on my inner resources last night as I went to a beautiful, outdoor café with a lot of silk lanterns hanging from the trees and lighting up the space.
Thanks to 3 obnoxious toddlers at the table next to me, I changed tables and ended up next to other Americans. Believe it or not, they’re kind of rare. Most of the Western travelers I’ve come across are from Europe, especially France.
Anyway, at the table next to mine was another lone female traveler. Her name was Natasha.
The food here is incredibly beautiful in its presentation, and she asked me what dish I got – Duck Pancakes – and we fell to talking.
When asked “so where are you from?” Natasha answered:
“Originally? I’m from Florida.”
“Me too,” I answered.
“Really? Where?”
“Orlando.”
“Shut up!”
“What high school did you go to?”
“Boone,” she replied.
“Edgewater,” I answered.
For those of you not from Central Florida, Boone was originally Orlando High, but when the town grew large enough to need a 2nd high school, Orlando High split into Boone and Edgewater.
So yeah, small world. We shared an OMFG moment and she joined me for dinner.
Isn’t that the craziest coincidence? It didn’t stop there.
Not only were we from Orlando, but we’d been gone from there for so long, we really weren’t psychologically Floridian anymore. That’s a good thing, btw. My experience of Orlando is that it’s conservative with a stifling way of life, especially for women.
That was one of the first things we’ve talked about. Another that we talked about was how the quality of travel changes when you’re no longer in your 20’s or even 30’s.
I was reminded of this a couple of nights ago when I tried to get some writing done at Utopia – “Zen by day, groovy by night” is its slogan – a really lovely outdoor bar/café with floor pillows and cushions, etc. on bamboo floors above the Nam Khan River about a ½ mile before it feeds into the mighty Mekong River.
Anyway, I chose a spot on a lower platform with a gorgeous view of a river at night. It was all peaceful and chill, or “zen,” until the group of 20-something travelers next to me kept growing and expanding and encroaching on my space.
They were there for the “groovy.”
It was obvious that these folks with varying accents speaking English and introducing themselves, probably met at one of the nearby hostels, and the invite of “Hey, we’re going out drinking! Wanna come?” was all one needed to make new friends.
Because that’s how easy it is to meet people when you’re traveling at that age. I remember that phase fondly and well, and I’m grateful I got to enjoy that.
But that’s not where I’m at now. I fully enjoyed hostel traveling for a generous length of time, and hostels saved me from excruciating loneliness during my DIY booktour/roadtrip in 2005-2006.
But not long after that, I realized I wanted the privacy of my own room and a place to write, as well as a sense of safety that my laptop wouldn’t get stolen.
Eventually, even the most young-at-heart of us outgrow hostel travel.
So meeting people is more random and less guaranteed.
There’s also the barrier of language. The Laos accent is really difficult for me to understand, so it limits the potential for connection.
So I appreciated that run-in with Natasha who was raised in the same parts where I was, and there with no language barrier. She was easy to connect with because we already had a lot in common. Dinner with her last night was the first meaty conversation I had had in 4 days.
Natasha has lived in China for the better part of 20 years, 12 years in Beijing and the last several in Shanghai. She works for the Montessori school system as a consultant.
Montessori in China. Who would have thought?
Anyway, she’s on a multi-stop trip back to St. Augustine – where she lives for a couple of months a year when she is in Florida – to sit out the coronavirus.
She said living through SARS in 2003 had been bad enough. She told me that everybody in China had to self-quarantine for 2 weeks back then, with groceries delivered to your door.
She also talked a lot about how social media made this thing blow up and the Chinese government doesn’t have a handle on this. She said shops are closing all over China, not just Wuhan – and everybody has to do a 14-day self-quarantine so the virus doesn’t explode exponentially, which it’s starting to do.
“Yep. Did that with SARS. Don’t need to do that again.”
(Ha! That pales in comparison to what we’re going through with the Coronavirus - I originally wrote this on January 30th.)
The panic has spread to Laos too. I showed up this morning at one of my coffee houses and couldn’t recognize the staff because all of them had on blue surgical face masks.
I’ve been seeing more and more face masks on folks as the days have gone by. I asked even though I already knew the answer.
“We’re worried about that virus from China,” said one. “We have Chinese people coming in here.”
Oh yeah, by the way, I’m still in Luang Prabang. I’ve changed my travel plans so many times, I’m embarrassed to admit it. What can I say? I am a lazy traveler.
But I also really fell in love with this town and wanted to stay long enough to truly absorb the VIBE of this place. I’m finally leaving on Saturday, and by the time I go, I will have been in SE Asia for 4 weeks, and will have spent half that time in Luang Prabang.
Now that’s magic.
Seems like Luang Prabang snuggled between the Nam Khan and Mekong Rivers is a vortex that SUCKS YOU IN! People have chuckled with every ticket change and extension of where I’m staying. I even changed hotels for 5 more days.
That gives me the impression that this happens a lot. That people come for a few days and end up staying a while.
One thing I’ll say about this trip is that I feel like I’ve definitely made some new friends. It’s always such a joy and a pleasure to meet new sisters when you least expect to.
Queer or straight, I’ve found that women are not only imprisoned by conformity, they are also the prison guards and the enforcers of the conformity that holds us down and back. I could write several books on this subject because this shit has caused me problems, heartache, and anguish for most of my life.
So, every time I meet a woman – anywhere - who lives on her terms instead of from standards imposed by outside forces, especially when she approaches life with more lust and more hunger and more passion, I do back flips and squeal WHEEE!!!!
One of the greatest blessings of this trip is that I believe I’ve met quite a few of these free-wheeling soulsisters.
Angela and I really connected in the time we hung out in Chiang Mai and Luang Prabang. I also met 2 or 3 women at the Tantric Shitshow with whom I hope to stay in touch. (Obviously, Quixotic Sierra is not one of them.)
And who knows? Maybe Natasha will be a new friend, or that meeting was nothing more than 2 ships passing in the night. Asia is more her turf than it is mine, and she doesn’t need me.
If that be the case, I had a lovely, rich conversation with her last night when I needed it, and that will probably keep me sustained until my next random meeting with a kindred spirit.
Speaking of kindred spirits…
Thanks so much for the letters, notes, texts, and calls (WhatsApp). I especially love it when somebody reaches out for the first time. These contacts, however brief, are priceless and nourishing. I need that right now, so please keep it coming.
Peace,
Mana
